5 Ways To Combat Petal Blindness

You’re terrified. It’s your anniversary. You scan this monstrous collage of flowers before you. What are you supposed to get? Where do you even begin?

Take in a deep breath, count to five, and remember: you’ve done this before. Plenty of times. You’re an expert at picking things out. Just think of all the times you’ve been a successful picker-outer:


As you know, a box wrench has a nice grip but is unsuitable in a tight space. An open-ended wrench is quick to use, but too specialized. An adjustable wrench is great for both loosening and tightening, and keeps the stress off the screw.

With flowers, you also want a happy medium. Not too big, not too small, and if you can help it, just about to break open in full bloom. Flowers at their peak die sooner, flowers too closed might not bloom in time, and flowers past their peak, well, you’re not doing anyone a favor there. Getting nervous? Just think of the wrenches.

Used Cars

Research helped you figure out if the better deal was that 1998 Toyota Camry or that 2001 Honda Accord for your teenager. But what helped you talk them down to a reasonable price was the confidence you had walking in.

Trust in yourself when you see those ranunculus flowers that remind you of your wife’s favorite decorative pillow. Sometimes, a few ape-like bangs on the chest help stir the bravado up.


You know bad pork when you see it. If you can’t smell the smoker, don’t even go in. Over-saucing is under-professional. You likely have a strong bias toward a certain type of sauce. Maybe it's vinegar, tomato, or even Alabama white sauce. Regardless, you could pick out your favorite blindfolded. 

Likewise, you know what fresh flowers look like. You know what they smell and feel like, even with petal blindness. Just pay attention, and like barbeque, follow your nose.

Sports Teams

While others might pull for the Rockets or the Spurs, maybe you’ve always been a die-hard Magic fan. Good season or bad, you’ve followed them to the bowels of hell and cried in your beer with your buddies when they got knocked out of the playoffs. A true supporter.

With flowers, you don’t get points for loyalty. On Valentine’s Day, if you’ve only ever bought red roses because that’s what you’ve always done, then it might be time to reevaluate. You may have heard your wife say (fifteen times) she’s madly in love with Baby’s Breath, so maybe it’s time to change teams. It will be refreshing.

A Good Woman

You remember the day you first met her. You remember the day you first felt her up, under the shirt, over the bra. You remember the day you figured out she was the one. Between that time, you were figuring out what made her the best option. (She was doing the same.) Many are the qualities you could list if you had the time. But some reasons can’t be put into words. A part of you went with your gut (And I don’t mean the stomach). You just knew—in part because you’d been searching for so long. When it comes to flowers, have faith in your gut. You’ve played this game. With a little help from a professional, you’ll know you made the right choice.

So there is it, 5 ways to combat the dreaded Petal Blindness, or, you can just hit up Real Men Buy Flowers, they’ve got your back.